burnyoudown | Open RP Post

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Open RP Post

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🔥 General squick/trigger list.
🔥 m/m for anything shippy.
🔥 General headcanon for Kavinsky. If you've got different headcanon/ideas for a psl, hit me with 'em; I'm flexible.
🔥 Kavinsky's kink list.
🔥 This is open to everyone who wants to thread with me!

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[Kavinsky made a thoughtful noise, stroking one hand along Elijah's spine slowly.]

I've got you.

[He murmured. Elijah had been playing rough with Skov- Kavinsky knew that. He knew how that usually made Skov feel, so he could imagine the effect it had on Eli. He wasn't sure Elijah had ever dealt in rough play like that before- with people other than the rest of his boys. It would explain a lot.

He didn't think anyone had ever anchored Elijah afterward before, either. Swan knew how to take care of Skov, to work out his energy and restlessness and bring him back down, but Eli- Kavinsky cupped the back of his neck, thumb stroking gently.]

How'd things go with Skov?

[His breath catches and he arches into Kavinsky's touch as his fingers dragged down along his spine. There was something about the way he said the words that buried itself between his ribs. He'd never had anyone that really had offered to catch him, to hold onto him. He's always been expected to stand on his own, and he did, most of the time.

But this was-- There were moments where he needed someone.

He made a helpless sort of sound as K's hand curled at the back of his neck. His own hands pressing softly against his chest, his eyelashes fluttering as he looks into the other boy's dark eyes. There was something magnetic about the moment, about having K catch him when he felt like flying was the same thing as falling. He murmured as he considered the question, which was at least easier to talk about.]

Good. Probably have bruises tomorrow.

[He smiles, but it's soft, a little unsure. That feeling that he can't quite explain. Desire that makes his heart beat rabbit fast.]

I mean, usually I flinch away from it. I've kept this distance from Skov- you- everyone, because I didn't want.. But now everyone knows, so if someone wants me- it's like I can trust it. So I didn't flinch. We fought until it felt like something else. Not like fighting. I couldn't think.

[His words are slow and heated and Elijah laughs a little at the end because he still can't really think straight, but he figures Kavinsky knows that. He feels almost drunk on it. It was a long way of saying that Skov had pushed him further than they usually went. Until Elijah was a mess with how it felt.]

[If Kavinsky didn't know better, he would assume Elijah was drunk. Or maybe he was anyway--you didn't always have to have alcohol involved to end up like this.

He made a thoughtful noise. Yeah, he was pretty sure Eli'd have bruises alright. He and Skov had been rough, but only as rough as both of them could handle, K figured. It was a little bit of a turn-on, knowing what his boys fighting meant, at least to Skov. Knowing that Skov was probably getting fucked by Swan right now.

But also- there was something endearing about Elijah saying he trusted it. Kavinsky wanted him to feel safe, to be safe with the rest of the pack. They were all sharp boys, rough around the edges, but they fit together like pieces of a puzzle. They all filled different voids in each other.]

You know fighting's Skov's foreplay sometimes, right?

[When his fingers had reached the bottom of Elijah's spine, he stroked back upwards, a gentle, repetitive motion.]

You like it, too.

[It wasn't a question. Elijah wouldn't be here in his arms like this if he hadn't enjoyed fighting with Skov. He wasn't sure if Eli had figured everything out yet, though--especially if this really was the first time he'd played rough. K wasn't going to judge him for it; he was going to do his best to be a safe space for Eli to talk about things.

People probably wouldn't think that Kavinsky was a 'safe space' for anyone or anything that wasn't nefarious, but- he enjoyed helping people figure out what they did and didn't like. Part of it was maybe a little selfish because the better people knew themselves the more fun he could have with them, but also- sometimes learning shit about yourself was hard. He wanted it to be easier for his pack. They were his closest friends, each and every one of them.]

[Saying he was drunk wouldn't be inaccurate, really. He felt like he was, honestly. Like he'd had a few shots too many, except that the feel of it was different, more a clear sort of thrill, high in a way that wasn't all blurred around the edges, but still left him reeling, his words a little rough. Holding onto the other boy to keep himself steady. And there was something about all of this that left him aching, his skin warm under Kavinsky's touch- the way those fingers trailed along his spine almost electric, but also strangely soothing. He'd never felt like this before. Something about Skov and Swan, and about being here with Kavinsky, body pressed close and straddled across his lap. Fingers on his skin.

A week ago this would have been unthinkable, almost more like horror. But now it was a sharp sort of pleasure. He felt like he fit here, with them. It felt like home. Not that he didn't have one back in Texas, but that was complicated. It was hard for a place to feel like home when you always knew you were going to leave it, when Eli spent more time away than walking the halls.

If he hadn't already been flushed, he would have at the question. But as it is he just nods, bites his lip for a moment, and then tries to put it into words.]

Yeah. Not the first round, but.. the second one. I used to pull away before it got.. obvious, I guess. But this time it was- different. I figured it out. And I dunno. I sort of wanted it, I guess? Even if I still don't quite know what I was looking for.

[Good is what he means when he says different, but he doesn't quite know how to say that yet. But he'd realized it was like foreplay and done it anyway. Breathless and heart racing, flirting back with Skov. But then maybe some of their sharp edges weren't really so different. He's still working it out, trying to figure out what he feels -- and why the thrill and the heat is almost more now that he's curled up here with Kavinsky, than it had been before.

He doesn't flinch or deny it when K says that he likes it. He just arches slowly into his touch, a flutter of his lashes, the way he slides up his spine making his body shift with the heat of it. It feels sort of like Kavinsky has him on a string, in a way that he likes. It makes him feel like he wont fall.]

Yeah. I like it when I'm here, anyway.

[Whether he means here with Kavinsky, or here with the pack, the only boys he could imagine doing this sort of thing with-- he doesn't clarify. But he probably doesn't really need to, when the answer is both.

Although the truth isn't just that Elijah's never played rough like this before. He's never done anything sexual with another person before, even if he'd usually die before admitting to it. He's never trusted anyone enough; either to let them that close, or to talk about it. But all of a sudden that was changing, and there were these lovely boys that he cared about more than he could spell out. And then there was Kavinsky. Beautiful and sharper than the rest. And he touched dreams. And he touched Eli in a way that felt different, made him want things he didn't yet know how to ask for.

People might not think of K as a safe space, but he feels safe to Elijah, anyway.]

You make it- even more. Better.

[Kavinsky made a thoughtful noise. It was an interesting situation when his boys fought. They could punch and kick and bite all they wanted and he'd never lift a finger, but if someone outside the pack took a swing--it'd be their funeral. It wasn't just that it was different within the pack, where fists weren't usually swung with hate or anger, but he trusted his boys to stop before they did any permanent harm. Even when Swan and Jiang sometimes fought for real, or Swan and Proko butted heads. It wasn't the same as Skov's foreplay, but there was trust there, too.]

Do you like him?

[That seemed like it should be a little obvious. You flirted when you liked someone. You engaged in rough play when you liked someone--or when you liked the play enough.

He was also glad that Elijah felt safe enough here to engage in things like that, to explore desires and boundaries and experience new things. That was one of the most important parts of the pack; giving his boys a space where they could do things like that without judgment. Well, alright- maybe there would be a little judgment, but in a friendly way.]

I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. Someone fucks with you, they fuck with all of us.

[It was a promise. He and the others would have Eli's back. But there was more to this than that- and Kavinsky might have never shied away from making assumptions before, but for some reason he didn't want to assume in this situation. He didn't want to convince himself that Elijah wanted him just because K wanted him.]

Are you saying you think I'm hot?

[It was gentle teasing.]

[It was a complicated question, do you like him. Because the answer was yes, but it was yes for all of K's boys, or else Elijah wouldn't have fallen in with them in the first place. But he knew that he meant more than that, he meant- for real. And that wasn't as simple. On the one hand, yes, he liked Skov far more than he did most people. Especially when it was like this, bruises on his skin. He got under his skin, and he wouldn't be against the idea of making out- Skov was cute but messy, which had a certain charm.

But he wasn't who Elijah liked the most, despite that. That was Kavinsky, because of course it was. And Proko was the one that came the closest for him, if it was going to be anyone else. But, Elijah couldn't imagine hitting either of them, fighting with them like he did with Skov. If K pinned him to the ground-- Eli quite suddenly doesn't quite know where he'd been intending to go with that line of thought, because the image is stupidly hot and it derails whatever he'd been trying to figure out.]

I mean, yeah. But.. well, I don't like him, like him.

[He liked Skov enough to flirt with him, but not enough to ache for the stupid shit. Like riding passenger in his car late some night when he couldn't sleep, or stupid dates, or to admit that he wanted him like he'd never wanted someone else; even if it was terrifying.

He smiles when K says that he wont let anyone hurt him. It was strange, in a way, because for so long Eli's always been the person that protected others. So that promise was... different. It meant something, even if he didn't have the words to say it. Instead he laughs softly at the question that follows, leaning up against Kavinsky so they're almost eye-to-eye, almost close enough to kiss.

But instead, Elijah just trails one of his hands up so he can slide fingers against the side of his neck, cupping against the line of his jaw in a tender sort of caress. It feels reckless, impossible, but he can't help himself. Maybe it's that he's still a little loopy from the bruises on his skin, the impact and the feel of it. From Kavinsky just- being here.]

Doesn't everyone?

[It's raw and overly honest, even if he doesn't spell it out, doesn't say I think you're hot or I want you, it's in the tone, the way that he looks at him, but still leans into his touch.]

Mmm.

[That was fair. Kavinsky liked Skov too- he liked all of his boys, of course. But he wasn't sure about romantically. Proko was different, though he might not have fully realized the extent things were different with him. Or with Eli. But he was starting to, maybe.

Especially with the way Elijah touched him. Kavinsky fought the urge to tip his face into Eli's hand, lest he give himself away as a glutton for physical contact.

Normally, he would have replied with an easily confident of course, they do, even though he knew better. He was sure there were people who didn't find him attractive at all, people who hated him. But that wasn't important right now. The important thing was how he couldn't look away from Eli's eyes, how badly he wanted to kiss him.]

So who do you like?

[It was maybe a juvenile question but he couldn't think of any better way to get to the bottom of things. Elijah had to like someone, didn't he? And he'd said- he said Kavinsky made things better. K might have played like he was doing his boys a favor by pulling them to his side but the truth was he was desperately lonely. He needed them just as much as they needed him, maybe more. He wanted someone to care about him, he wanted to feel loved and appreciated.]

I--

[It may be a juvenile question, but that didn't make it easy. And the way that Elijah dodged around being specific about how he felt about Skov was sort of immature in its own way, too. And yeah, he had the excuse that he was still a bit punch-drunk, but that wasn't the real reason, either. So he falters a little at the question, struggling as he tries to find the right words.

Lying would be easier, of course.

But the thing is that Kavinsky already knows all of his big secrets, and somehow this seems.. easier to hold between them than the dreaming, or the fact that he was trans. The harder part is figuring out what to say, how to say it to him. Eli's struck by how Kavinsky is looking at him, dark eyes focused, like the answer isn't a joke, is something that matters. It's been easy, up until now, just to tell himself that it didn't matter, this was just what it meant to be in his circle. How could you resist being half in love with him?

But suddenly, it seems like more than that. And he nods softly, a little shy, even if he tries to hide it, to smooth it over into something better than that.]

It's you. I dunno how to say it, man. I just want this.

[It wasn't that he loved him yet. But whatever it was, this thing that drew him to K felt like more than a crush. Because he wanted late-night drives in K's Mitsubishi, he wanted him to see his dreams, he wanted everything he could get. He wanted to make him smile. He wanted new things he hadn't been willing to risk with anyone else. The idea that if he was going to climb into anyone's lap when he was like this, it had to be with K.]

[He waited patiently, fingers sliding along Elijah's skin. Anyone else, he would've teased and prompted along the way, told them to spit it out or get on with it or something like that, but. Eli was one of his boys and this was- a soft moment. A moment he didn't want to ruin or break the mood of. He might not get it back if he did.

When Elijah answered, a thrill raced down Kavinsky's spine. He'd had a suspicion, more subconscious than anything, but it'd been there. He'd been especially drawn to Eli ever since the dreams, when he'd found out the other boy wasn't so different than him. He wanted kinship. He wanted to not feel or be alone.]

I like you, too, sweetheart.

[It was an easy confession and he smiled afterward, sliding a hand up into Elijah's hair, nails grazing gently against his scalp.

Someone else would've asked, maybe- someone else would've sought permission. Kavinsky didn't like asking. Instead, he leaned up, nudging his mouth against Elijah's in a soft kiss. He didn't lack confidence; he just didn't want to push Eli too much too fast.]

[He doesn't know what he expected, but somehow it wasn't this. It wasn't the easy way that he says it, the way that sweetheart rolls off his tongue like an easy endearment. This thing that he's felt since before that night, but definitely after. Definitely when they were alone in Kavinsky's bedroom, with Elijah in just boxers and his tee-shirt, whispering I'm glad I met you as he clung to him like an anchor.

Someone that was like him, or at least someone that understood what it was like. What dreaming did to you, what it was to bend the lines of real and not real.

He shivered as Kavinsky's fingers trailed up, sliding into his hair, pulling a low murmur from his mouth as he looked at him. Stripped raw, too honest, feelings too real to be put into words. And then he kisses him and Elijah leans into it, fingers in his shirt tugging him in close. The way K kisses him is soft, but Elijah is too hungry to let it stay that way.

K isn't the only one that's a glutton for contact. Between fighting with Skov, and being here with K and the knowledge that he wants him, it's impossible to do anything but melt into him. He's ached for him, and he wants- he just wants- touch. He wants to touch, to be touched, and not feel like someone will look at him like an alien in his own skin.]

[Kavinsky hadn't gone into this expecting to be told Elijah cared about him like that, either. But he didn't regret a thing. K'd wanted him, probably, since that night with the dead dreams in his bedroom. Since before that. But K had always been lonely and greedy and wanted. Was it really that greedy to want to be cared about, though? Or was it natural? He liked to think it was the latter, no matter how many times people told him it was the former.

He didn't hesitate to deepen the kiss, fingernails scratching gently at Elijah's scalp, again. A light brush of his thumb. Kissing him felt right, like he should've done it weeks ago. He'd been letting Eli find his place in the pack though, get used to all of them without anyone pushing him about something sexual. Anyone else, Kavinsky would've been pushing, himelf, but- he knew when someone shouldn't be tested, when they might bolt. He'd just- he'd been being careful. He was capable of it, contrary to popular belief.

Right now, he wanted whatever Elijah was comfortable with, whether that was some kissing or something more. Sometimes, just making out was nice. Even if K was a sexual creature. Proko had cracked jokes about him being an incubus or deity before, after all.]

[For what it was worth, Elijah didn't think it was greedy. Or at least, not a sort of greedy that he couldn't handle, because if it was, then he was greedy too. But then he'd always known that about himself, it was just that normally he didn't admit to it, didn't talk about it. Because admitting to it would mean admitting what he wanted, would mean talking about what he was, and why being greedy was uncomfortable.

But they'd already jumped that hurdle. So it wasn't scary now. Not with Kavinsky, not with the other boy's mouth on his, nails scratching against his scalp, and Eli's body leaning in to him like an ache that says more. To be honest, he appreciated the fact that Kavinsky had given him time, given him the space to find himself, to figure out where he belonged between all of them. Elijah would snarl if someone implied that he needed to be handled with a delicate touch, but the truth was that sometimes he did. Careful was what had let them get here, his fingers clutching against him, clinging to K's shirt.]

I.. I want you.

[He says it soft, gasped in between kisses. The words almost a little bit shy with how they murmur against the other boy's jaw. Because he's a sexual creature too, it's just-- complicated. Usually that means being alone behind closed doors. But with Kavinsky.. he trusts him. He wants more than that. But he's never-- it's tentative, even if it's honest, even if he means it. Something he probably couldn't have said if K had pushed him about it.

He covers it with a kiss, with an edge of something hungry and maybe wanton. It feels good, feels right, feels like Kavinsky out of anyone makes sense. Maybe that's ridiculous, but he knows and he wants Elijah anyway, has yet to look at him like it makes him different.]

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