[Adam was cuddled up against Kavinsky, his head nestled into his shoulder. It had become more common than not, on nights where he could stay over. Not late enough that they were asleep yet, they were just- talking. Adam in a pair of boxers, his fingers tracing idly along Kavinsky's abs and his ribcage. He teases him sometimes about how nice his abs would look if he ate more than Twizzlers. But it's worry more than teasing, really.

Because he cares impossibly about the boy he's tangled up with.

They talk about all sorts of things, of course. Cars. The things they care about. Failed relationships. Adam tells him about Blue, about how he hadn't thought he was worthy of anyone after her, not until Skov and Swan. And at first he was just glad for the attention, and now he's here, with a boy he cares about, that he can say he's dating. It will never be you and me, she'd said to him. It's a strange parallel, and one that actually gets them here, talking about Ronan Lynch in more detail than they have before.

It's complicated for Adam, but those things are harder to say outloud. That they're still friends, but he never feels equal to Ronan the way he does in this space he's build with Kavinsky and the other boys. He feels like everything he fights to hold onto is a joke. It's hard not to be around them and still feel as small as he did before.

He sighs, exhaling as he lets his fingers slot against his ribs, holding onto him a little tighter. But he laughs, a little bit self-conscious, but it's vulnerability. It's giving away a piece of himself.]

I mean- I've never told anyone, but I've been attracted to him since basically the first day of school. So I sort of get it. He's like a heart attack. How do you not want to kiss him?