[Adam stepped in closer at the question, touched fingers hesitantly against the other boy's chest, like he could answer it without words. But even in a dream he knew that saying things mattered, and he wasn't as incapable as Ronan, even if he'd never have Gansey's honeyed charm.]

Of course. I know we're not close, but you're still.. You matter to me.

[And it's true, as he looks up at Kavinsky, meets his dark eyes for a moment. And not just because of this, because of seeing his hurts and raw edges. But he cared about his boys, he took in people with nowhere else to go and gave them a home, let them find that in each other. So even if Adam was not personally close to Kavinsky, he still cared about him, he still valued what he did and who he was to Swan and Skov and Jiang and Proko.

He hasn't said it, but he understood why Ronan was drawn to him.

At the question he smiles a little bit thinly, sharp and not-quite dangerous; but it's not something really aimed at Kavinsky.]

A sacrifice. My hands and eyes. At the beginning it was so much and I couldn't understand it, but it's better now. Since I'm close to you, it's almost easy. I bring seeds for the forest. I find places the ley line can't flow and find ways to bend it. I do the things it can't do for itself.

[Adam doesn't regret his choice. Of course, he was hard-headed and stubborn and would never have admitted it to Ronan or Gansey even if he had, but it's true. It's less terrifying now, less overwhelming. They can speak to each other and Adam can feel it on his skin. Kavinsky wasn't wrong about there being a price, but Adam didn't really mind the cost.

The real cost was in time; like everything in his life was.]